About Me
I'm Chen Z Li. 33, China born, Alabama raised. 10+ years in SF startups as a PM. Studied Economics & Psychology at Dartmouth. Former nerd who learned to level up and wants to share it with others.
I began my journey as clueless as most guys when it came to women. My first girlfriend in high school had to tell me point blank she wanted hugs. I didn’t know what I was doing, but I never gave up.
I approach dating and relationships in the same way I approached my hobbies and my career in tech. Learn as much as I can, reinvent myself and my approach, and eventually built a systematic framework to get results. This year, I went on 10 dates in 10 weeks, without using any apps. I’ve spent nearly a decade in committed relationships.
Most importantly, I understand the challenges of dating as an Asian guy in SF. We get lumped together and stereotyped. The apps beat down on your self esteem. Friendzoned and not taken seriously. I know what it takes to break through.
No shortcuts, no canned lines, and no tricks.
I focus on building the most attractive version of you. I take a personal and systematic approach: we identify what’s been holding you back, build real skills with deliberate in-person practice, and develop genuine confidence that comes from both failure and success.
Everyone is different. Some guys need more help with styling and presentation. Other people have great profiles, but can’t build any momentum after the first date. Some people are ready for relationships, but don’t know what it takes to be a great boyfriend.
I tailor my coaching based on where you are at and where you want to be. You’ll get 1-on-1 in-person coaching, honest feedback, and a clear game plan for your goals. I’ll push you to be uncomfortable, but if you want comfort, go watch a TikTok at home. We’ll put in the work and focus on getting results.
This isn't just about getting a date. It’s about developing social skills you'll use forever - in dating, relationships, and even your job.
Foundation & Presence: Style, grooming, body language, fitness, photography. How to present yourself confidently before you even speak.
Social Skills: Starting conversations, reading the room, making people laugh, being genuinely interesting.
Dating Strategy: Meeting women (apps and real life), moving from conversation to dates, and planning memorable experiences that flow naturally.
Attraction & Escalation: Flirting, creating chemistry, reading signals, physical escalation, going for the kiss.
Relationship Skills: Communication, vulnerability, handling conflict, meeting families, navigating cultural dynamics, being a great partner.
You learn these skills, practice them, and use them for a lifetime.